Letting Go

Convince me. Convince me that I should let go. I know what I SHOULD do but it proves to be difficult and sad. I told myself that this time I will stick to what I've said but I can't resist. The temptation is too strong. If I give this up now, it will really break my heart. This NEED vs WANT thing is pretty tiring.

I DON'T WANT TO RETURN THIS DRESS!!! But I think I must.

Ooohhh kala nyo kung ano! Hahahahahahaha!

Pero totoo, THIS IS FREAKINGGGG HEARTBREAKING. Gaaahhhddd!!!! I REALLY LOVE THIS DRESS. Pero leche. I promised that I will save money. I actually have it all planned out then this happened. Hayyy....The price of this dress is equals all the things that I NEED or more pa nga eh. Pero I REALLY WANT it. :(

Grabe kanina pa after I bought it I was contemplating if I'm gonna return it or not, if it's really wise to buy it or not, etc. Tulala na ko sa work. Hahahaha! So much for being responsible. Sabi ko na eh, temptation talaga tong dress na to. I was looking at it for days and days already then kanina I I wasn't able to resist it...I TRIED IT ON - THE FIRST STEP TO SHOPPING HEAVEN/HELL. So with 2 minutes left on my break, I went to the counter and paid for it. Sabi ko bahala na. I can return it anyway. There are only 2 or 3 left so, shit, bahala na. Hahaha! I CAN'T LOSE IT.

So here I am. I am actually wearing it now. Hahaha!

My sister told me not to return it. But I'm still undecided. I'm falling more in love with it though...

50/50

I dropped Greek Myth. Hay the lecheness of that class. Can't afford to get a C+ in an elective. Not gonna happen. It was supposed to be easy but, gahd, ang hirap ng puro papers tapos ang baba pa magbigay ng grade.

And one more thing, GPA boosters are not for me.

---

Saw HIM the other day.
The guy of every girl's dream.
Heart skipped.

When something begins,...

...you generally have no idea how it's going to end.

Okay, I'm watching the season finale of Grey's Anatomy for the second time. Shit. I'm so affected.

Psychic Ako!

The F*ccccckkk! Shet. Sabi ko na e. Sabi ko na yon ang mangyayari e!!!! SHYEEEETTTT!!!

Delaying tactics

Okay. So the closet is clean, the bed is made, I hanged my dress for the wedding already, and now I'm typing this. I've also checked my mail, finished parts 4-6 of Grey's Anatomy, shed a tear because of that, checked Facebook... everything. I'll do anything and everything just so I don't have to do my essay yet. I tried to write something last night but it's so uninspired. I don't know I'm just so not in the mood. No ideas comes to mind.

So okay, I'm sooo kilig over Grey's Anatomy. Who would've thought na si Izzie and Alex ang makakasal ng gabi na yon. And Alex' wedding vow is so sweet and sincere. Man, that's how you do it! That's how being sweet without being cheesy kadiri is. HAHAHA!

So yeah, tomorrow's the wedding. I just hope the weather won't be crrrazzzyyy. Magsundance talaga ako bukas! Haha!

Superdupermegaover SAYA na kwentuhan

For the past few days, mega kaming magkwentuhan about our views on relationships. Maaaannn....ang saya talaga kasama ng mga girlfriends. (pati na rin yong two boys na kasama namin. I love you both. Sobra!) Final na to. Birds of the same feather really do flock together.

Q: Mabait na pangit o Masama na gwapo?
All of us in unison: Masama na gwapo

HAHAHAHA!!!

***

A friend told me that she saw his new pictures. I saw it too. This will sound mean but he doesn't deserve to be happy. It's not that I'm bitter. HELLO. Hahahahaha! It's just that, if you ask me, ang sama-sama ng ugali nya. Hindi nya deserve maging masaya. :P

***

I kept on telling myself to take it easy and not to expect that things will swiftly fall into place. Ang kulit ko. I'm not listening to what I'm saying. HAHA. Pero fine, this time hahayaan ko lang. And for once, I'LL SHUT MY MOUTH. Leche. Hahaha.

Promise ayoko na. Stop na muna ko sa pagkwento about him. Mahirap na. LOL

Wala na?

Aside from those two, WALA NA BA?

Todo na yon, Mother?

Grabe.

This is it! Ganado!

For the first time in months, ganado ako mag-aral.
AAAAHHH...sarap ng feeling.
Mega sulat ako ng notes kanina at ngayon ay mag-uumpisa na ako magbasa para sa lecture bukas. This is it. Making it right, man.

Extraordinary Girls

After a long, long time, nag-get together din ang mga Hunters at Koalas. Di nga lang kumpleto dahil may dalawang kulang. Pero grabe, soooobrang sarap ng kwentuhan. Di namin namalayan ang oras. We catched up on things and then super kwentuhan lang. It's really good to know people who think like you. Haha! We all admit we are not 'typical girls'. We think differently. The way we see things especially when it comes to relationships is so not typical. Lalo na Pinoy kami. Sobrang iba sa ibang mga babae. Sabi nga namin we are "abnormal". Haha! Pero masyado daw negative so "extraordinary" na lang daw. Hahahahaha!

I really feel and see that. The difference. Minsan nga nafi-feel ko na parang walang naniniwala sa akin when I talk about what I think/feel. Haha. So madalas when I have something in mind, I talk to these girls 'cause they won't think I'm weird and I won't get this i-don't-believe-you stare. They usually get what I'm saying just like that. Hindi na kailangan ng mahabang explanation or ng convincing words.

That's why I LOVE THESE GIRLS.

Birds of the same feather really do flock together in our case. Haha!

Walang dahilan para magmadali

Malayo pa ang mararating natin.
Nasa atin ang lahat ng oras,
ang lahat ng pagkakataon.
Atin ang bukas.
Sigurado yon.

Swoon. I'll catch you.

This morning I thought, by July I should already have "the MACHINE". LOL. That's reasonable, I think. I have two months to save and prepare for it. Aahhh. I'm excited. I've been wanting something like that for YEARS already. Happy, happy!

Last night, I think I have been a little carried away. I just can't control my hatred whenever he's the topic. God knows how much I disapprove of what he's doing and how disappointed I am. Just like what I said last night, I tried so hard to make his relationship with the barkada solid. I didn't tell them any of the negative thoughts I have of him 'cause I want them to be OK. But still this happened. Like this morning, he's on Facebook and for sure he saw the messages our friend left. Nagreply ba? NO! That's what aggravates my hatred of him. I hate seeing the efforts of my friends to reach out to him tapos wala man lang response coming from him. Just a bit more na lang talaga. I'll be indifferent soon. And really, when that happens, his existence would be erased for good.

ANYWAY, ang aga-aga. Ayoko na inisin sarili ko. Fun stuff na lang! :)

I'm trying to convince myself that there's no need to rush. I'm telling myself to FREAKING CALM DOWN. Marami pang time pero ewan, sadya yata akong anxious. Haha! ADIIIIIKKK! Adik and crazy. Hahaha! But whatever. It's nice and it's fun. It makes me happy in ways that the 'past' never did. I'm not saying this will lead to somewhere. It's just that right now, it's fun and it makes me smile. Yon lang! Haha! He's FRESH, SUNNY, and HAPPY just like summer. :) I can't stop smiling.

I don't know. Right now, I'm thinking, that sometimes you just have to focus on the present and stop worrying about the future. This situation is risk-free anyway so there's no need to fuss about next month, next year, or forever. It makes me smile now and it's all that matters. It's good this way. Sooo uncomplicated and just pure fun. Just like summer, baby. Just like summer.

Couldn't stop

Pano ba punuin to ng smileys?

:D

Ingat, Gatecrasher.

WTH, Mother?!?

FREAAAAAKKKK!!!

I don't know what Mother Nature is trying to pull but THE HELL, THAT WAS ENTERTAINING!!! Kailangan talaga may PUNCHLINE eh. HAHAHAHAHA!!!

But I'm happy. Really. Alisin lang yung punchline. Hahahahahaha!

Anong silbi ng narito kung di mo na kailangan?

Sana (Up Dharma Down)
Nilibot na ang buong mundo
Di pa rin ako nakukuntento
Makakahanap ng ipapalit
Nang walang babala, lumipas ay nagbabalik pala
Nalilito na ako, hindi na dapat ganito
Nakaraan ay natapos at napagdaanan na
Bakit nasisindak pa sa twing naaalala
Matatauhan na wala ka na pala
Ako, Sila'y nandito na
Ikaw na lang ang kulang
Anong lunod o lalim
Bat di na lang lumutang?
Anong pait ang matamis
At aking susubukan?
Anong silbi ng narito kung di mo na kailangan pa?

(First part of the song. For the rest of the lyrics, click here.)

----

If I'm Miss Typical Girl or Miss Drama Queen,

OR

if that's a love story of a normal person

this would've been the MOST FITTING theme song.

BUT I'M NOT and IT'S NOT.

I like this song though VERY, VERY MUCH.

I LOVE UP DHARMA DOWN!!!